The Merriest Christmas Ever
by Skies-Shall-Rain
Summary: It's a Teen Titans Christmas party. Anything could happen, but will Slade ruin the holiday for them all? And the bigger question: how will the possible romances play out?


**Hi everyone! This is one very long chapter because I want this all done today! Yippee! MERRY CHRISTMAS! Yesh it's on time! *does a happy dance* NOTE: This is best read in the time frame of 11:00 PM—3:00 AM. Ya know, that time when absolutely everything is freakin' hilarious? Yup. **

**Also, I spent almost 24 straight hours on this. The hour hit me at about 2:00 PM on 12/23. I wanted to get it up Christmas Day, so I wrote almost nonstop on the 23rd until 3 AM. On Christmas Eve Day, I woke up at 8 AM and immediately began to write. I wrote until 3:30 PM, taking short breaks. Then I had to go see my family. I wrote during Christmas dinner (which was on Christmas Eve this year) and on Christmas morning, before I went to bed and I posted it right after I opened my presents. Guess what I got? I'll share with you!**

**A Swiss army knife**

**A totally weird and freaky funky hat**

**A Daughtry CD**

**A Colbie Caillat CD**

**An Adele CD**

**$40 in gift cards to the local mall**

**A pair of awesome mood earrings**

**A turquoise necklace and matching earrings**

**An amazing zebra print party-style-ish dress, only one ruffled strap for the "sleeves" (which I got on Christmas Eve, so I wore it to midnight mass, of course :))**

**Seasons 1—3 of NCIS**

**Season 2 of Leverage**

**4 books**

**A Kelly Clarkson CD (Now I have ALL her CDs!)**

**An Avril Lavigne CD**

**A P!nk CD**

**A Lady Gaga CD**

**A karaoke machine and like 4 different CDs for it**

**Fuzzy socks**

**Slippers**

**Uggs**

**Awesome boots**

**Clothes**

**A Wii game**

**Tear gas**

**Another Wii game**

**Big Bang Theory seasons 3&4**

**And some stuff I probably forgot to mention!**

**Merry Christmas, from Skies!**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing!**

* * *

><p>"But Robin, <em>pleeeeeeease<em>?" Beast Boy pleaded, desperately gripping his leader's ankle.

"For the last time, n—" Robin's exasperated reply was cut short as he made the mistake of looking down at the green changeling. Beast Boy had turned into a kitten, and was staring at him with "The Face." Robin hesitated, and Starfire joined in, clutching his arm.

"Yes, please friend Robin?" she begged. Robin turned to refuse, but Starfire's wide green eyes were hopeful and filled with tears, and her lower lip was trembling...and Beast Boy was meowing pitifully and winding around his legs...and Cyborg was playing sad music in the background...Robin threw up his hands in exasperation.

"Fine! Alright, fine! We can host a Titans Christmas party _IF_," he cut off the celebrations and smirked, "you can convince Raven," Starfire's face lit up. Robin grew suspicious, but held firm. Beast Boy grinned.

"Alright. No problem!" he said cheerfully, running towards the empath's room.

"Should I be worried?" Robin asked, raising an eyebrow under his mask. Starfire shook her head and giggled knowingly. Beast Boy ran back in.

"Done!"

"What? How?" Robin asked, gaping. Beast Boy shrugged.

"Well, she and Jinx are really close. This will be a chance for them to see each other again. Plus Argent will be here, and those three little kids. She'd never admit it, but _I_ can tell that she has a soft spot for them," Beast Boy grinned and jabbed his thumb into his own chest.

"No way! We are _not_ letting _Jinx_—" Robin began, swinging his hand in a "no" motion.

"_Robin_! She is a Titan, and she is our friend! She _WILL_ attend the party!" Starfire practically yelled. Robin about peed his pants as her eyes glowed green.

"Heh. Okay. Send the e-vites?"

"Great! Cyborg! _Now!_" Beast Boy yelled. Cyborg, standing nearby, hit two buttons on his arm. The common room of Titans Tower was immediately covered in Christmas decor, tree, mistletoe, and all. A DJ booth was set up in a corner, and the kitchen was transformed into a huge buffet. Robin stared, slack-jawed.

"We were prepared," Cyborg explained. "Invitations sent, prepare for guests to arrive in fifteen minutes."

"_What_?" Robin yelled.

"We were the _very_ prepared," Starfire said simply as she removed her holoring, revealing a short red satin dress with spaghetti straps, red high heels, a gold necklace with a ruby and emerald holly pendant, earrings shaped like candy canes, hair perfectly curled into ringlets, a reindeer antler headband, and a red fabric cuff bracelet decorated with small silver bells that tinkled delicately. Beast Boy also removed his holoring to reveal a dark green shirt with a plate of Christmas cookies on it, black jeans, and green sneakers. Cyborg just pulled a red tie decorated with reindeer out of some compartment and tied it around his neck. Robin stared at them (especially Starfire) in disbelief.

"Okay, seriously. What. The. Santa Claus?" he asked. Cyborg grinned.

"You'd better get dressed, Rob," he said. Robin steamed and turned to walk out...only to run into Raven, still in her uniform.

"No. I am staying in uniform," she told the others.

"No, you are not," Starfire argued.

"Yes, I am."

"No, you are not."

"I am."

"You are not!" Starfire yelled, grabbing her friend's hand and ripping off the holoring. Raven glared as her party attire was revealed to be a short, strapless red velvet dress with white fur trim, heeled red boots that stretched halfway up her calves, a slim silver chain with a Santa Claus charm for a necklace, snowman earrings, and a Santa Claus hat over her regular hairstyle.

"Starfire picked it out," she defended herself as the boys stared at her. "Robin, I know you already look like Christmas, but you should probably change," Robin steamed at the comment and stormed away to get dressed.

* * *

><p>Barely five minutes later, he was back, dressed in a red shirt with a Christmas tree on the front, dark jeans, and red sneakers. He quickly found that Beast Boy and Cyborg had both donned Santa hats. Beast Boy held out a Santa hat, filled with paper slips.<p>

"Draw one!" he said cheerfully. Robin reached in and drew a paper, then unfolded it to see Starfire's name written in her neat handwriting.

"It says—"

"Shh! Whoever it is, that's your Secret Santa assignment!" Beast Boy interrupted. Robin sighed. "You have to give them something of yours that you think they'd like. It could be an object or something unsubs...uns...un..."

"Unsubstantial?" Robin supplied.

"Yeah that!" Beast Boy said, grinning. "Official rules are gonna be announced when everyone gets here, but for now just don't tell anyone!" he said, winking. "Oh and by the way..."

"What?" Robin asked warily. Something was forced onto his head from behind. He whirled around to see Cyborg.

"You're a reindeer for the party games," he said simply, smiling and crossing his arms while Beast Boy chuckled. Robin glanced into the window and saw the reindeer antler headband upon his head.

"What did I ever do? Really?" he sighed to the world.

* * *

><p>Kid Flash, expectedly, was the first to arrive. He was wearing a red shirt with "Merry Christmas" written in white letters on the front, dark jeans, and red sneakers. After drawing his Secret Santa assignment and being crowned with a Santa hat, he noticed that Robin looked around like he was looking for someone.<p>

"Where's Jinx?" the Boy Wonder asked.

"What, you think that just because I brought her to the battle with the Brotherhood that I'm her mode of transportation to all Titan functions?" Kid Flash asked curiously. Robin shook his head.

"Sorry, wasn't thinking," he muttered. Next to arrive were Titans East. Bumble Bee was wearing a short sparkly green dress with one ruffled strap and black stilettos, and her hair was loose and straightened and immediately adorned with reindeer antlers. Speedy had a red shirt with a snowman, black jeans, and red sneakers, as well as a Santa hat. Aqualad just had a plain green shirt, black jeans, and black sneakers, although he was quickly forced into reindeer antlers. Mas and Menos were identically dressed in Santa suits, but Mas was given a Santa hat and Menos reindeer antlers.

"Guess what color Bumble Bee's panties are and win a prize!" Speedy called. Everyone gave him disturbed looks, and Bumble Bee blushed.

"Downside of flying here; he could see up my dress while I was climbing into the ship," she explained.

"You take all the fun out of everything," Speedy mumbled, stalking towards the buffet. Any efforts to stop him were interrupted by the grand entrance of the rest of the Titans.

Herald—dressed in a red shirt with a Santa sleigh on it, dark jeans, green sneakers—had clearly teleported them. He, Kole, Pantha, Red Star, Hot Spot, Argent, and Wildebeest were placed on the Santa team while Gnarrk, Jericho, Thunder, Lightning, Melvin, Timmy, Teether, Bobby, and Jinx were with the reindeer. Terra showed up soon after, and was proclaimed a reindeer.

* * *

><p>"Oi! This is unfair!" Argent realized from the couch, counting the number of antlers vs. Santa hats.<p>

"Yeah. Yeah, right!" Hot Spot agreed, tearing his gaze away from the New Zealander's short dark red strapless dress, black heels, and black lace gloves. Argent sighed and pushed her teammate off the couch, where he lay on the floor and made absolutely no move to get up.

"Take Silkie!" Terra suggested, putting a Santa hat on the beloved pet. Argent rolled her eyes.

"That evens it all out, love," she said sarcastically.

* * *

><p>"Okay, that is one cool dress," Cyborg complimented Kole, who giggled.<p>

"Thanks!" she exclaimed, twirling on her white flats to show off the red dress covered in blinking Christmas lights.

"How'd you get it past Gnarrk?" Cyborg asked.

"Oh, he's okay with technology now. I think you helped him when you came down to visit," Ke said, looking over at the caveman, who was festively dressed in a red loincloth.

* * *

><p><em>"Really? Must you play this?"<em> Jericho signed to Thunder and Lightning, wincing as the sounds of pop music pounded his head.

"Of course! This is the best music, is in not, brother?" Lightning asked.

"It is, brother," Thunder replied.

_"Then I'll just go ask Raven where she keeps the Tylenol,"_ Jericho signed, rolling his eyes as he walked away from the brothers.

* * *

><p>"Isn't this party <em>awesome<em>?" Herald asked, dancing around while everyone stared at him in shock and horror.

"Herald...what did you have?" Jinx asked worriedly.

"I know what you should have," Herald tried to walk over to the girl, who was dressed in an extremely small strapless red dress with candy cane stripes along with red and white pumps, and was wearing her hair down in a slightly wavy fashion. Kid Flash, however, had other plans. He intercepted Herald, grabbed his shoulders, and shook him viciously.

"Knock it off! If you even think about—wait, is that alcohol?" he asked, catching a whiff on Herald's breath.

"Maybe...the punch was delicious," Herald said. Kid Flash smacked him.

"Get a hold of yourself man! No, not like that, there are kids here!" he scolded as Raven and Bumble Bee quickly ushered Mas, Menos, Melvin, Timmy, Teether, and of course Bobby out of the room. Meanwhile, Pantha walked over to the punch bowl and sniffed it.

"Someone has put an alcoholic drink in the punch," she announced.

"SPEEDY!" everyone yelled.

"ROBIN!" Speedy yelled at the same time. When everyone kept glaring at him, he began to whistle innocently.

"Okay, whatever, you know? We're all pretty responsible...most of us," Cyborg said. "We're all teenagers, except the kids, who are already out anyhow. And if I know Bee, she and Raven are putting them to bed."

"So...the alcohol can stay?" Speedy asked.

"The alcohol can stay. And maybe somebody should go get more?" Robin asked. Everyone gawked at him. "What?" it was at this moment that the doorbell rang.

"Yay! They came!" Beast Boy cheered, running for the door and throwing it open to reveal...

Villains?

"TITANS! G—"

"Whoa, chill dude!" Beast Boy interrupted. "Cy and I invited them. There's a truce for today through January second."

"No kidding?" Robin asked.

"It's the honest truth," Blackfire put in. The villains were assigned Secret Santas and put into teams: Cheshire, Johnny Rancid, Mammoth, Billy Numerous, Kyd Wykkyd, and Angel donned Santa hats while Kitten, Fang, Blackfire, Gizmo, SeeMore, and Private Hive were assigned antlers.

"Your attention please!" Beast Boy announced as Raven and Bumble Bee reentered the room. Everyone turned to where he stood at the DJ booth, holding a microphone. "You all have your Secret Santa assignments. By the time midnight comes around, you have to have some type of gift; material or not. If it is an object, you can't go buy it, you have to already own it. Also, the punch is now alcoholic thanks to Speedy, and Robin has suggested that we get more alcohol. We need a volunteer."

"I'll go," Johnny Rancid said. Everyone turned and looked at him suspiciously while Jinx surreptitiously ushered Gizmo up to the room with the other kids. Even if he was twelve, he was too young for alcohol in her opinion.

"I'm 21, so it's legal for me to buy it. And I will _buy_ it. Later!"

"You have to keep wearing the hat!" Beast Boy ordered.

"What's up with that anyhow?" Angel complained.

"They separate us into teams for the party games to come!" Beast Boy announced brightly.

"Oh super..." Johnny muttered as he walked out.

"Now let's dance!" Beast Boy hit a button and some random pop song blasted through the speakers just ad Jinx returned. Everyone stood around awkwardly until Robin—_Robin!_—pulled Starfire onto the dance floor. Cyborg and Bumble Bee followed, as did Pantha and Red Star and Kitten and Fang. Cheshire, dressed in a short and revealing sparkly green cutout dress and white heels, pulled Speedy onto the floor next. Jericho got past his dislike of the music to wordlessly ask Kole to dance, and Kyd Wykkyd did the same with Angel, who was dressed in a red halter gown with a low back and white stilettos. Hot Spot raised his eyebrows at Argent, and she rolled her eyes pulled him out to the others.

* * *

><p>"So Jinx, for old times' sake—" SeeMore began, only to be pushed aside by Kid Flash.<p>

"Go find your own girlfriend!" the speedster yelled.

"You do know that I'm _not_ your girlfriend?" Jinx asked. Kid Flash blushed.

"Um..." Jinx rolled her eyes.

"Come on, dimwit," she teased, pulling him onto the dance floor.

* * *

><p>"So Raven..." Beast Boy began.<p>

"I don't dance."

"Oh come on!"

"No."

"Please?"

"No."

"Pretty please?"

"_No._"

"Will you just sit here and do nothing?"

"Yes."

"Raven!"

"What."

"Please?" he asked. She rolled her eyes.

"_One dance_. Then you leave me alone."

"Deal!" he agreed, smiling brightly as he dragged her onto the dance floor.

* * *

><p>Herald, Wildebeest, Mammoth, Billy Numerous, Aqualad, Gnarrk, Thunder, Lightning, SeeMore, and Private Hive looked at each other before charging Blackfire and Terra, pleading for a dance. Overwhelmed, the girls stood there with wide eyes.<p>

"I choose..." Blackfire began, looking around. "Silkie!"

"NOOOOO!" came the unanimous cry.

"I'm kidding; trumpet kid," she said. Herald stumbled forward and all but carried the alien onto the dance floor. Everyone else looked expectantly at Terra.

"Hmm...Okay! Everyone get in a circle around me while I close my eyes. Whoever I point at is who I dance with," Terra said. The guys hurried to arrange in an oval-ish shape while the blonde squeezed her eyes shut, stuck out a hand, spun around rapidly, stopped, and opened her eyes to see...

"Yeah! Eat it!" Aqualad cheered as he dragged Terra onto the dance floor. And thus began the awkward group dancing between the guys. A slow song began and the actual pairs of people slowed down to dance, while the group of guys paired off to avoid being left out. It ended up as Thunder and Lightning, Mammoth and Gnarrk, Billy and Private, and (this one was quite funny to see) SeeMore and Wildebeest. In the kids' room, the young Titans were dancing under the watchful eyes of Bobby: Mas and Menos, Timmy and Teether, and—somehow—Gizmo and Melvin. Yeah, nobody really knew how that started.

Somehow, a fairly serious atmosphere was maintained until Johnny came back with various types of alcohol beverages. Then the real fun began...

* * *

><p>"Hey look dudes! Fifteen minutes 'til Christmas!" Beast Boy cheered, almost falling over. Raven, one of the very few (mostly) sober Titans, rolled her eyes. It was at this moment that the TV turned on to reveal a familiar face. Everyone gasped.<p>

"Slade!" Robin growled, slamming his fist towards his palm as he faced to the right of the TV. Towards meaning he totally missed and accidentally punched Hot Spot in the crotch. Slade raised a metal eyebrow...kind of.

"Hello...Robin. Are you drunk?"

"Who needs to know?"

"You just said my name."

"...So?"

"Is...Is that a party?"

"Sure is."

"And...you...you didn't invite _me_?"

"Nope."

"Well, I was going to declare a truce until the new year, but now I suppose I'll just have to activate the ten bombs I have planted around the city! You have twenty minutes to save your precious home. Tick tock, Robin. _Tick. Tock,_" and the screen turned black. Robin whirled around and almost fell over.

"Alright! Whose bright idea was it to not invite Slade?"

"Uh...it was pretty much unanimous," Mammoth pointed out. Robin nodded.

"Right. Well, I guess we'll have to split up to find the bombs, defeat Slade, and save the city! TITANS!" Robin began his little maneuver, but paused right in the middle. "And...and villains too. Yeah, Titans and villains. _GO_!"

* * *

><p>Five minutes later, all 39 of them converged at Slade's badly planned, not-very-secret, incredibly lame secret lair. It was in a petting zoo.<p>

"He's had some bad moments, but really. What was he thinking this time?" Beast Boy asked.

"I dunno guys. Slade's crafty. We gotta stay sharp!" Robin announced, right before he walked into a wooden pole.

"Robin's right. I don't like this; Slade probably has a plan," Raven said darkly. Everyone sober enough to understand her nodded. They waited for Robin to say something.

"Titans and villains, go!" Kole finally said. Everyone ran forward, into the petting zoo. Slade leaped out from behind a cotton candy machine and blocked their path.

"Slade!" Robin said, again trying to slam his fist into his palm and again reducing Hot Spot to the fetal position.

"The Teen Titans. And some friends. And some enemies. And a giant bear," Slade said monotonously.

"You're going _dooooooooown_!" Robin said, bringing both thumbs down, crossing his eyes, and making raspberries for emphasis. Slade blinked.

"Titans, villains, kids, and bear! GO!" Robin yelled, drawing a bottle of hair gel and charging.

Slade put a hand over Robin's face to stop him.

Robin stuck out his tongue and licked Slade's hand.

"_EEEEEEEEEAAAOOUHWWWWWWW_!" Slade squealed, jumping backwards and shaking his hand. "My minions! ATTACK!"

"What the Rudolph?" Kitten asked as a mass of petting zoo animals raced towards the do-gooders. Each one had one eye glowing gold and one black. Everyone was suddenly fighting for their lives against llamas, donkeys, ponies, mules, zonkeys, alpacas, goats, sheep, pigs, chickens, ducks, and geese. Slade was standing away from it all, eating cotton candy and laughing evilly as he watched his minions defeat the Titans. Then the tables turned. All the minions turned and walked away! First the alpacas, then the ponies, then the mules, the donkeys zonkeys, pigs, goats, geese, sheep, ducks, chickens, and finally the llamas. When they were gone, a green llama remained. Slade's eyes—eye?—filled with tears.

"What...no...how?" he choked. Beast Boy returned to his natural form.

"Dude. That was totally not thought through. I just told them to go away," he said simply.

"Uh, Beast Boy?" Raven said while everyone stared openly.

"Yeah?"

"...You're naked."

"Holy Blitzen, you're right!"

At that point, Slade decided to just surrender instead of facing a bunch of drunk teenagers, a few kind-of sober ones, a drunk adult, some kids, and an oversized stuffed bear. And Silkie, who had suddenly appeared, crawled up to Slade, and...well, everyone found out what Silkie had eaten for dinner. Plus, they were all sporting either Santa hats or reindeer antlers. All in all, it was quite terrifying to the villain (you must remember that Beast Boy was naked at this point) so he reasoned that the torture would end soonest if he called 911 and turned himself in.

* * *

><p>"Ten...nine...eight..." everyone was counting down to the beat of the giant digital clock in the window. Each party guest held a glass of wine (or water if they were underage) in one hand and a Christmas bell in the other. "Seven...six...five..." everyone pressed in close together in a huddle, since Beast Boy was once again dressed. "Four! Three!" they shouted. "<em>Two! One!<em> MERRY CHRISTMAS!" came the roar as everyone rang their bells before throwing them aside.

"FELIZ NAVIDAD!" could be heard faintly from Mas, Menos, and Pantha.

"HAPPY EASTER!" yelled Speedy at the same time.

Glasses clinked together and friend and foe alike was embraced in the toast. Once the glasses were empty and the hugs were done, Beast Boy once again took the microphone.

"Okay everyone! Form a circle, everyone next to your Secret Santa assignment, and let the giving begin!" he announced, leaping across to Kitten and pulling her to stand beside him. Kitten beckoned to SeeMore, SeeMore called Thunder...the circle slowly formed until it ended with Raven. "I guess I'll start," Beast Boy said nervously, turning to Kitten and speaking into the microphone he had in his hand. "Kitten, I don't exactly know you, but I think you'll appreciate this," he took a pink seashell from his pocket and pressed it into her hands. "My mom gave it to me, my real mom. It's the second to last thing she ever gave me," Beast Boy admitted.

"Aww," said the circle.

"Beast Boy...I don't know what to say," Kitten smiled and slid the seashell into her pocket before taking the mic and turning to SeeMore. "SeeMore, this was a gift from my daddy," she took a diamond clip out of her hair and handed it to him. "It only looked pretty for me, but diamonds are one of the paths to a girl's heart, and those are real. It might be more useful for you," she said. SeeMore grinned.

"Thanks a bunch, Kitten!" he said, pulling her into a hug before turning to Thunder. "These are real X-Ray glasses. I hope they come in handy," he said, giving the glasses to the Titan.

"Thank you," Thunder rumbled, taking the microphone and facing Johnny Rancid. "This is a part of the thunder. It will make the ground shake," he said, handing the villain a purple quarter.

"Um...thanks," Johnny said awkwardly, looking to Teether. "Here kid, knock yourself out," he pulled a large pair of black and red car dice from his pocket and dropped them in front of Teether, who immediately began to chew them. Wildebeest leaned down to look at Teether, and received a hug to the muzzle.

"Pienso que usted sólo recibió su regalo, Ñu. ¿Puedo hacerme el mío ahora complacen?" Menos asked impatiently. Wildebeest snorted and picked Menos up before squeezing him in a hug. Menos turned to Kid Flash and sighed. "Usted es el muchacho más rápido vivo," he muttered. Kid Flash grinned.

"Thank you Menos. Hearing you admit it makes me so happy!" the speedster turned to Jinx and took the microphone. "I really wish I didn't have to say this into I microphone, but I guess I will," he said with a shrug. Jinx shot him a dangerous glare, like she was saying _don't you dare try what I think you're going to try._ "Anyhow, everyone here knows how I converted Jinx from evil—hi how ya doin' SeeMore—and turned her into a Titan, and you probably guessed that I started to like her along the way. Well, you're wrong. Jinx, I have two Christmas gifts for you. First..." he whipped out a rose. Dasher only knows where he kept them. Jinx took it anyway. "And my second Christmas gift to you, Jinx, is a secret," Kid Flash lowered his voice to a whisper, although he was whispering into the microphone. "I'm in love with you."

While she processed that, he slammed his lips onto hers in the hope that she returned his feelings. For a moment, his heart was in a limbo as she didn't respond. Then it began to flutter again as she slowly began to kiss back, slowly becoming more passionate—

"Okay, I hate to break this up, but I'm kind of waiting for my gift. You guys can make out later," Angel said with a laugh. Jinx and Kid Flash pulled apart, blushing.

"Right. Okay, here," Jinx bent down and pulled a small, wood-carved four leaf clover from her shoe and handed it to Angel. "I told myself that the day I was lucky enough to kiss the boy I loved, I would give this away. It's brought me luck enough to do that; maybe you'll have some good days, too."

"Thanks, Jinx," Angel said with a smile, embracing the girl before turning to Melvin. "Melvin, would you like to fly?" she asked. Melvin nodded happily, and Angel led her up to the roof. They could be seen out the window; Angel holding Melvin by her arms as they swooped above the bay.

When the two returned, Melvin was red-faced and grinning. Angel's wings were ruffled, but she led Melvin back to their place before shaking out her wings and giving the microphone to Melvin. Only then did the others notice that the villain had been holding the young Titan's hand.

"Gizmo, right?" Melvin asked the boy beside her. Gizmo nodded. Melvin leaned over and planted a kiss on his cheek, causing the villain's face to turn red. Melvin, whose face already couldn't get any redder, joined the rest of the girls in giggling at Gizmo's dumbstruck expression. The young villain muttered something about "crud-munching snot-pickers," snatched the microphone from Melvin, and turned to Herald.

"Here. It's a recall device for your trumpet. Push the red button, and your trumpet will appear wherever the device is," he muttered. Herald blinked.

"Cool."

"Yeah yeah."

"So Aqualad," Herald began, turning. "I happen to have two SeaWorld passes on me. I was gonna go down myself, but then Secret Santa, and..."

"Gee, thanks," Aqualad said, stunned. He turned to Speedy. "Here. I happen to have something on me..." he took a comb from his pocket and shakily gave it to the archer.

"You...you're giving me your favorite comb?"

"Don't say it out loud!" Aqualad exclaimed tearfully.

"Thank you so much!"

"Um...awkward," Cheshire whispered from somewhere in the circle. Speedy blushed.

"Anyhow, Bumble Bee, my gift is a secret. Something that you need to know. I already conferred with the other person it concerns," Speedy tapped the microphone and held it up to his mouth to make sure he was heard clearly. "I, Speedy of Titans East, am dating Cheshire. That's all," he then handed the mic to Bumble Bee, who almost dropped it.

"Okay...don't really know what to say to that," she admitted before turning to Cyborg. "Merry Christmas, Sparky!" she exclaimed, planting a kiss on his cheek. Cyborg blushed and put an arm around her.

"Merry Christmas," he replied, kissing her cheek and making her blush.

"So...are they together now or what?" Kid Flash asked.

"They better be! I put a hundred bucks on it!" Robin exclaimed. Cyborg ignored this and turned to Gnarrk.

"I don't know if you'll like this very much, but here," he said, holding out a hammer. The caveman's eyes lit up as he grabbed it.

"Gnarrk gnarrk gnarrk!" he yelled.

"Gnark says thanks, he likes it very much," Kole called to Cyborg.

"No problem, Gnarrk,"

"Garrk gnarrk _gnarrk _gnarrk gnarrk," Gnarrk told Pantha, holding out his arm.

"He says he heard you were very strong, and he wants to challenge you to an arm wrestle," Kole translated. Pantha raised an eyebrow.

"Oh? Bring it on!" she said, gripping his hand. Someone brought over a table and two chairs, and they sat there for ten minutes in a deadlock. Money changed hands, bets were made, sabotage was attempted. But still nothing. Until...

Pantha gasped as Gnarrk slowly began to push her hand closer to the table. She gritted her teeth and tried to channel the energy she always felt in the ring...

Gnarrk's eyes widened in surprise as Pantha suddenly slammed his hand in up an arc and down onto the table. He looked up.

"The Pantha remains undefeated!" Pantha boasted, beating her chest.

"_Gnarrk_ gnarrk gnarrk gnarrk," Gnarrk muttered sourly.

"He says he let you win, because it's your present," Kole translated.

"You almost beat me, Gnarrk. You are a worthy opponent," Pantha told him. Gnarrk smiled.

"I'm _still_ out _another_ hundred and fifty bucks!" Robin yelled angrily. Everyone ignored him and got back into a circle.

"Bobby, I really didn't know what to get a stuffed bear, so I will simply give you this roll of duct tape. It solves all problems," Pantha said, handing a roll of silver tape to Bobby. Bobby took it, turned to Private Hive, and gave him a bear hug.

"Um...thanks," Private Hive said before turning to Mas. "Here ya go little guy; always keep 'em with me," he handed him two bottles of Five-Hour Energy. Mas blinked at him and turned to Red Star, wordlessly taking a souvenir fridge magnet from his pocket and handing it to Red Star.

"Thank you, comrade!" Red Star exclaimed before facing Billy Numerous. "You, I will give this packet of hot chocolate. I do not know where it came from," he admitted, handing over the packet.

"Awesome!" Billy exclaimed, looking at Lightning. "Uh...this is a brand new video game I bought. I hope you enjoy it," he said as he gave Lightning Mega Monkeys 18.

"You're giving it...to me? Thank you!" Lighting exclaimed before turning to Fang. "This is a small electric cannon. Merry Christmas."

"Uh...Merry Christmas?" Fang said before turning to Robin. "Oh man this is awkward..." he said. Across the circle, Kitten blushed. "Okay. How about I give you a promise that Kitten never goes crazy-obsessed love-struck fan girl on you again?"

"Deal," Robin agreed, shaking Fang's...leg? Hair? Foot? The end of one of his spider legs. Robin turned around and looked at Starfire. "Star, I'm going to let you see past my mask," he said. Starfire gasped.

"Ooh," went the circle, trying to lean in for a peek. Robin slid his mask up, just enough to reveal two handsome blue eyes, before dropping it back into place.

"Glorious!" swooned Starfire.

"Mmfdjrgmbd," grumbled the circle in discontent. Starfire turned to her sister.

"Sister, I know that we are not close. Please accept this bracelet; it was a gift to me from our parents," Starfire said, taking a small, slim silver bracelet decorated with green and purple jewels from within her uniform and holding it out to Blackfire, who tackled her in a Tamaranean bear hug.

"Thank you!" she sighed, her eyes watering as she slid the bracelet onto her wrist. "Sister," she whispered before turning to Cheshire. "Cheshire, this is a potion from Tamaran. It..." Blackfire leaned close and whispered something in Cheshire's ear. She stiffened and laughed.

"Wonderful!" she exclaimed, eyeing Speedy across the circle.

Speedy wondered what he was possibly in for.

"Kole, this is a necklace that I was given many years ago. I believe you will find it beautiful," Cheshire said, handing a fine silver necklace with a crystal pendant in the shape of a kitten to Kole, who flung her arms around Cheshire.

"Thank you," she said softly. "I love it."

"I'm glad," Cheshire said, returning the hug in a slightly awkward fashion.

"Jericho," Kole said, pulling away from the hug and turning to the mute blonde. "I'm really not copying any ideas," and before anyone could let that sink in, Kole had leaned in and gently kissed his cheek, leaving the poor boy as red as Robin's uniform. Kole herself was blushing pink as butterflies viciously attacked her stomach. Jericho gave a silent fake cough to hide his embarrassment, smiled shakily at Kole, and turned to Kyd Wykkyd to wordlessly hand over a CD. Kyd Wykkyd wordlessly accepted before wordlessly turning to Argent and handing her something black. Argent looked puzzled for a moment, then started giggling. She then all but attacked Kyd in a hug.

"Thanks, love!" she said through her giggles. Kyd's red eyes were about as wide as moons right then.

"What did he give you?" Johnny asked.

"A lump of coal!" Argent answered. Everyone started laughing, and it didn't die down until Argent turned to Hot Spot. "Sorry love, I don't have anything except my clothes and I'm not spilling a secret in front of everyone."

"...Then give me your clothes."

"Pardon?"

"Can't you just, like, hand me your bra or something?"

"Is there enough fabric at the top of this dress to _fit_ a bra in?" Argent asked incredulously. Hot Spot pretended to scrutinize the dress.

"I guess not," then his eyes dropped. "_But_..."

"But...?" Argent asked, following his line of sight and flushing red. "No! No no no, no way in Prancer's harness am I doing that! _No!_"

"But..."

"_No!"_

"I need a present!" Hot Spot whined.

"What does he want?" Aqualad asked, not quite following what was happening.

"He _wants_ my bloody _underwear_!" Argent growled, glaring at the offending boy. Everyone fell silent.

"Well, the rules..."

"The requirements..."

Unidentified male voiced from around the circle pitched in to help Hot Spot. There were quite a few smacks as their girlfriends—or people who knew they had a crush or girlfriend—slapped them.

"Fine," Argent huffed. Hot Spot pumped his fist and she hit him in the crotch. Everyone turned the children away (except Timmy, who was curled up with his blanket, Mammoth, and Silkie on the floor of the hallway) as Argent managed to slide her panties off without revealing anything. Hot Spot gaped at her as she threw the black lace undergarment at him. His gaze switched from the object on his hand, to Argent, back to the panties, and back to Argent. She crossed her arms and huffed, as if saying I hope you're happy. Hot Spot just grinned, tucked the panties into his pocket, and turned to Terra.

"Here," he said, tossing her a lighter. "Merry Christmas!"

"Uh...thanks?" she asked, flicking it on and off before turning to Raven. "Look, Raven. I just wanted to say...I'm sorry. For...for everything I've done," she said softly. Raven's eyes narrowed as she searched Terra's face.

"It's in the past," Raven said simply with a faint smile. Terra looked up and grinned. Raven turned to Beast Boy. They stared at each other for a few seconds, then Raven pulled him into a hug. "Merry Christmas, Beast Boy," she said softly.

"Merry Christmas, Rae."

"Dang it! They didn't kiss. Now I owe _another_ fifty bucks! Comet!" Robin swore.

* * *

><p>"<em>Donder<em>!" Cheshire screeched, noticing how close she had been. The first Christmas game? Pin the Nose on Rudolph. So far, there were noses on the floor, on wall, on ceiling, on window, in the tree, in the food, in the punch, in the bay, on people, in people, on the butt of the reindeer, and now on his eye. Cheshire had been the last person.

"Okay, now we have..." Cyborg said dramatically as he drew a slip of paper from a Santa hat. "Mistletoe Madness! Pair up—at least six pairs per team—under some mistletoe, put your hands behind your back and an ornament between you two at your stomachs, then get it up between your mouths. First pair to succeed without using their hands wins!"

Pairs were not-so-swiftly established as people shied around asking. Eventually, the Santas shoved their pairs forward as Speedy and Cheshire, Red Star and Pantha, Kyd Wykkyd and Angel, Hot Spot and Argent, Kole and Herald, and Beast Boy and Raven. The reindeer were forced to use all of their girls except Melvin, pairing them up as Starfire and Robin, Kitten and Fang, Terra and Aqualad, Bumble Bee and Jericho, Blackfire and Lightning, and Jinx and SeeMore. Jinx kept casting forlorn, desperate glances at Kid Flash, as though pleading for help. Nobody missed the glares that Cyborg shot at Jericho, or that Jericho shot at Herald, or that Kole shot at Bumble Bee. Everyone definitely caught the evil looks Kid Flash was sending SeeMore. Then the bell sounded, and it all began.

Jinx immediately grabbed the ornament and threw it at the nearest window. "Oops," she said, walking over to Kid Flash and slinging an arm around his waist while SeeMore grumbled.

Blackfire and Lightning were next out, followed by Terra and Aqualad, Kitten and Fang, and Pantha and Red Star. Everyone watched the remaining pairs, noticing their styles.

Speedy and Cheshire weren't afraid to get...intimate. Angel was using her wings to her advantage, Herald was trying in vain to make advances, and Hot Spot was on the receiving end of many physical and verbal abuses. Jericho kept getting distracted while Bumble Bee's drive to win was making Cyborg's face turn red with jealousy. Raven was all-out screaming at Beast Boy, and Starfire and Robin were doing pretty well.

Suddenly, Kole and Jericho smacked their ornaments aside, clearly fed up with their respective partners' attitudes. Beast Boy and Raven just gave up. Angel's ornament slipped and she accidentally reached out a hand to catch it. Argent stepped back as soon as Hot Spot—who was using his face—got the ornament up to her chest. This left two pairs: an official couple vs. the ones everyone knew were practically a couple. AKA, Cheshire and Speedy vs. Robin and Starfire. Finally, Cheshire and Speedy were just a little slower than Robin and Starfire.

"And, the reindeer win!" Everyone under some mistletoe, give your lovely lady a kiss," Cyborg announced. Problem? There was mistletoe everywhere, so everyone was under it. Jinx and Kid Flash got into a full-on make-out session, as did Cheshire (who lifted her mask, but her face was quickly covered) and Speedy. Cyborg confidently strode over to Bumble Bee and put his arms around her waist before kissing her, and Robin (_FINALLY_!) pushed his lips onto Starfire's. Some girls were disappointed when the guys they desired simply drifted away, but they didn't show it, no. They bided their time.

* * *

><p>After Bobbing for Presents, Eggnog Chugging, The Unwrap-A-Thon, Starring the Tree, Bake-Off, and the following Eat-Off, everyone was exhausted. While the boys and not-single girls chatted, the single girls (except Blackfire) huddled in the shadows of the gigantic Christmas tree.<p>

"Okay. We need a plan," Kole said firmly. Everyone nodded.

"Yeah. They aren't going to come to us, so _we_ have to go to _them_," Terra agreed. Raven gave her a suspicious look.

"Wait. Who are _you_ after?"

"Aqualad. Why?"

"...No reason."

"Whatever!" Argent interrupted. "By the time the sun rises, we'll all have boyfriends. Agreed?"

"Agreed!" everyone chorused.

"Break!" Angel said, and they split up.

* * *

><p>"Karaoke time!" Bumble Bee cheered.<p>

"I'll go first," Angel said boldly, stepping up and selection her song on the karaoke machine. All I Want For Christmas Is You by Mariah Carey started playing, and she looked pointedly at a certain boy before she began the song.

_"I don't want a lot for Christmas, there is just one thing I need. I don't care about the presents underneath the Christmas tree. I just want you for my own, more than you could ever know. Make my wish come true. All I want for Christmas is you,"_ as the music sped up, Angel started using her wings as she stalked towards the specific boy in question. Kyd Wykkyd's eyes widened and he looked around before pointing at himself questioningly. Angel nodded, still singing. When the song ended, she tossed the microphone aside and tackled him.

More Christmas songs were sung and karaoke was concluded, but the rest of the single girls were still pouting in the "Lonely Corner."

* * *

><p>Christmas dancing began. Slow dances. Hopes rose. Terra was the first to make a move, grabbing Aqualad and pulling him out to join the couples. He cautiously took her waist, and she stepped in to be closer to him.<p>

"Uh...Terra? What are you doing?" Aqualad asked.

"I'm getting what I want for Christmas," she whispered, leaning up to kiss him. Aqualad's eyes widened when her lips met his, and she tried to pull away, but he brought his hand around to the back of her neck and held her there. After a tender moment, they separated and rested their foreheads against each other's.

"Did you get what you wanted?" Aqualad asked breathlessly. Terra smiled.

"Everything on my list."

Then she went in for another kiss.

* * *

><p>Kole noticed Herald and Jericho both approaching her and winced. She didn't want to hurt any feelings, but this could not be handled delicately.<p>

"Hey Kole, you wanna dance?" Herald asked. Before Kole could speak, Jericho tapped Herald's shoulder. Herald turned, and Jericho held out his hand in a sign that did not require knowledge of sign language to be interpreted before pulling Kole onto the dance floor. Kole giggled a little bit and Jericho looked at her strangely as he put his arms around her waist.

"I didn't know you were capable of signing that, Jericho," she said. Jericho began to move his hands to sign something. "Can we...not talk for a little bit? I'd really like to just dance right now," she asked with a pleading expression. Jericho nodded and she rested her cheek on his shoulder, hearing his heart thump louder and faster. After a few seconds, Kole decided to chance it. "You know, I _really_ like you, Jericho," she murmured. He froze, and she raised her head to look him in the eyes. "So—mph!" she exclaimed, eyes wide in shock. _Mph_ is the noise one makes when one's apology is suddenly cut off with an unexpected kiss. Jericho pulled back, looking worried.

_"You did mean that kind of like, right_?" he signed. Instead of answering, Kole simply pulled him back in.

* * *

><p>Pantha looked around uncomfortably. She wanted to dance, but slow dancing wasn't particularly her style.<p>

"Would you like to dance?" Red Star asked from behind her.

"I am not truly fond of this particular style," Pantha admitted.

"Neither am I. I just wanted an excuse to dance with you. Perhaps we should sit down instead?" Pantha nodded and followed him to the couch where they sat side by side. "You know Pantha, there is a woman that I have liked for a long time," Red Star began. "She is very strong and smart, and also very beautiful. She is very dear to me, but I do not wish to ruin what I have with her."

"You will not," Pantha assured him, her mind racing. _Could it be...could he be...?_

"I hope not," Red Star said, putting his arm around her shoulders as she leaned into him. So it wasn't a kiss, but so what? Pantha could understand the value of taking things slow.

* * *

><p>Argent took one look at Hot Spot's red face and knew something was up. He walked over to her and mumbled something.<p>

"What was that? Speak up, love."

"Can we go somewhere private?" he asked. Argent raised an eyebrow, and his face literally burst into flames. "Not like _that_! Just to talk, I promise. Never mind, it was a stupid idea..." he started to walk away.

"Spotty!" Argent called, and he paused. "Where did you have in mind?"

And that's how they ended up in one of the guest bedrooms, sitting on the bed in awkward silence.

"Listen, I...I have something to tell you..." Hot Spot began

"Me too," Argent said.

"You go first."

"No, you can."

"No, you."

"Fine," they said at the same time. "I like you."

"Really?" Argent asked.

"Wait, what? How did that even happen?" Hot Spot asked, referring to the simultaneous admittance.

"I have no clue, and honestly, I don't really care right now," she told him. Hot Spot kissed her, and she felt the butterflies that had been in her stomach all night fly into her heart. The kiss turned into a make-out session, and one coherent thought was running through Argent's mind for an instant before it dissolved into nonsense.

_Robin's going to have a fit when he sees how messed up this bed is._

* * *

><p>Beast Boy sighed forlornly as he stared at Terra and Aqualad. Aqualad stole all of his girls! <em>Every single one!<em>

"Wanna dance?" came a voice from behind him. Beast Boy whipped around to see Raven.

"I...thought you didn't dance?" he asked. Raven sighed.

"Look Beast Boy, this is a one-time offer. Take it or leave it," she had barely finished speaking when he pulled her onto the dance floor and put his arms around her waist.

"Rae..." she glared at him. "Raven," he corrected himself, "have you ever been in love?" she looked at him with a startled expression.

"Once," she said in a guarded tone.

"Malchior?" he asked. She did not reply. "I thought I was...with Terra. I didn't even see the girl who was right in front of me, the one I'm _really_ in love with."

"Beast Boy..."

"You don't have to say you like me back, just say you don't hate me," he interrupted swiftly. She frowned.

"I don't like you," she said flatly, and his heart shattered. "I love you."

"Wait, wha—?" he asked, confused, right before she kissed him. As the sun rose, they stayed frozen beneath the mistletoe, locked in their embrace. Someone (Cyborg) started a cheer, and soon everyone was applauding. Beast Boy knew that Raven's face was as red as her dress, and that his own was the same color, but he didn't care.

* * *

><p>That night, there was even more alcohol. Everyone stayed in Titans Tower, and almost every guy with a girlfriend got laid. The guests were so hung-over the next morning that they decided to stay until the truce was over. Robin was having a wonderful time playing poker with SeeMore, Mammoth, and Aqualad when...<p>

"EEP!"

"STARFIRE!" he yelled, tipping over the table and throwing his cards everywhere before knocking his new friends (and Aqualad) over and sprinting for the door, running into the door before it opened, falling on his butt, jumping up, and tearing through the Tower to his girlfriend's bedroom.

"Boyfriend Robin! I am the pregnant!"

* * *

><p><strong>Please note that when I wrote the Slade part...it was 1 AM on December 24. That's kinda self-explanatory. And for the record, this was NOT how I planned my first Christmas special to go. As soon as I finished writing, I sat back, read it over, laughed at the Slade bit, then when I finished I said to myself, "WTF did I just write? I mean really, what was...did I just write that? <em>Did<em> I just write that?"**

**I have a few things to say about that story. If you can find the incident I'm talking about. Kinda like a commentary.**

**Me: Let's criticize the overuse of "Kid Flash carries Jinx," shall we? Other Me: But I love it! Me: Uh, duh! That's why you criticize it! Other Me: Oohhh...**

**OMG HOT SPOT HOW **_**DARE**_** YOU LIE ON THE FLOOR AND LOOK UP ARGENT'S DRESS? PERVERT!**

**Ew! **_**HERALD**_**!**

**Speedy! *gasp* How **_**dare**_** you blame Robin?**

**OH BOOYAH ROBIN GOT SOME **_**BALLS**_** AND GOT STARFIRE ON DA DANCE FLOOR!**

**Aw poow wittwle Swadey-wadey waddn't invwited two the pwarty!**

**Rob, Rob, Rob of the Titans, **_**watch out for that pole!**_

**Really Slade? Cotton candy? That's so very evil...**

**Okay I punished Hot Spot enough now...twice hit in the crotch by Robin is enough. Maybe. **

**Robin! We are not second graders! We **_**do not**_** lick!**

**Zonkeys exist. They rule. ZONKEYS FTW!**

**Slade? Seriously dude? **_**Again**_** with the cotton candy? WTF man, I thought you were supposed to be evil?**

_**Natural**_** being the key word. **

_**Gross**_**! Silkie barf! Looks like Slade needs new shoes...can he just go into Kohl's and buy some, or does he special-order? **

**Beast Boy should just strip at every battle. The Titans would have **_**such**_** an easy life then...**

**I'm probably off with translations. Dancer Internet translators...supposed to be: I think you just received your gift, Wildebeest. Can I get mine now please?**

**Again, I'm probably off: You are the fastest boy alive. **

**If you didn't get the translation of Feliz Navidad earlier in the story, please turn on the radio or go back to first grade. **

**Originally, the duct tape went to Gnarrk. Then I couldn't think of a present for Bobby. **

**Yeah random number there. **

**Well I dunno **_**what**_** to call it!**

**What should Kyd get Argent? Oh I know! A lump of coal!**

**It was at this point that I realized the Secret Santas were fudged; Mammoth gave to Timmy and Timmy gave to Mammoth. **

**Gasp! Hot Spot! How perverted! I guess I **_**didn't**_** punish you enough...**

**Yeah, "the dress" meaning what's **_**under**_** the dress...**

**GIBBS SLAPS!**

**And I squeeze in some punishment there...**

**WTF Robin? Are you addicted to gambling now? That's what, $300 you owe?**

**Um...how did the noses get to some of those places?**

**Yeah, Mistletoe Madness was inspired by Coconut Smoochie from Just Go With It. What? It was a funny movie! *pouts***

**Oh YESH! Robin **_**still**_** gotz some balls!**

**...At this point, I realized I left out Red X. Then I told myself, Self, why do you snowing care?**

**Ya! Go Jericho! Play that Angry Birds! (I have seen a shirt with the Angry Birds slingshot on it, like a screenshot of the game, and text that says "Flipping the Bird")**

**In case you need to know, the couples who didn't have sex are BB and Rae-Rae, Pantha and Red Star, and Kole and Jericho. What? They were all drunk!**

**Don't get all up on my Vixen for Starfire's early pregnancy. She's an alien, she might know way early like that! **

**I gotta go soon, my mom made her amazingly heavenly chocolate pie! Just a couple more things before you kindly leave a review:**

**Oh sweet Santa Claus and mother of chocolate, the world hath given me a Christmas present. **

**At 1:40 AM on Christmas, when I returned home from my aunt's house, I looked out the window at the sky and saw that it was filled with stars. The night was crisp, clean, and crystal clear. When I looked at my favorite constellation, Cassiopeia, I realized something: I had wished for a white Christmas, but a starry one was even better. **

**That's my true Christmas story. **

**Anyhow, that's it for my 2011 Christmas special, my first ever holiday special. Please accept my special Christmas blessing. **

**On this special day of days, so anticipated by the world, be merry. For today is a day of family, a day of friends, a day of gifts. On this day, no matter how far the distance, hearts always meet at home. Giving or receiving, find joy in gathering round the tree. May your muses give you the gift of inspiration, and may your reviews always be positive. Let whatever you read surpass your expectations, and let your days be filled with laughter. Should you find yourself experiencing the glum represents of sorrow, may your friends, stories, and reviewers cheer you. Merry Christmas and God bless. Let your new year be filled with wonderful things, and may your cup overflow with good fortune. **

**Merry Christmas**

**With love, **

**Skies**


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